'amazingly' STUPID

I saw a video taken on top of a building. Recording a girl and a guy who's arguing by the roadside. To my surprise all of a sudden the guy start kicking the girl like no one's looking. BY THE ROAD SIDE WITH CARS passing by and the best thing is no one stop to help. You see how inconsiderate Malaysian are. When there are time they don't have to 'sibuk', the have to be a 'penyibuk', when times like this situation, they just drive pass. That is what I call a stupid Malaysians. They prefer to 'sibuk' about accidents(with bloods and all those things) rather than helping this kind of people. And people wonder why is Malaysia so undevelop right...Because of Malaysian's mentality... So shallow.

When I first met boyfie many people criticize me why on earth do I have to choose other races?? Want to know why? Because people with the same religion as mine are mostly so shallow minded. If someone marries a Euro, why people dont' say anything? Instead they're sooooooo fucking proud... 'Oh I'm married to a mat salleh' See what I mean. Why do people have to be soooo proud of that? He/She is also a normal human being. They'll be bury in a coffin and underground and meet God after that. Just that they're more advance, civilized (not all though, some are still stupid), tall, white and bla bla bla...

This is just some of the reason my Malaysia is not develop. The government can create what ever policy they want but in the end, it comes down to the people.

online shop and daddy gets a year older

Well I was in a good mood yesterday. Boyfie went to futsal centre early than usual as there was a tournament and 1 person could not handle the centre. At the mean time, I was out with The Group (riana, fifi, khang, yazid and wan joinedtowards the end of our outing). We watch The Back-Up Plan and it was a touching movie. I nearly cried. Not something that boyfie would like. Too girlie. I was fucking happy until I think of Monday. Starting of the week and it is not good at all. Best thing is I hate my job to be honest..........But daddy said, just be grateful I still have a job in the middle of world's economic downturn...

Anyway, I was thinking of getting my blogshop up and running again but not so sure how. Starting was a disaster. Manage to sell a few and ending up I wear those clothes...Hahahaha... But I will definitely get it done and once successful, I'm quiting!!!!!!!!!!!!. Who doesn't want to be your own boss right???...And it's daddy's birthday today..

Happy Birthday Daddy. We love you a lot.

weekend with The Group

Boyfie will have to work AGAIN this weekend. So there goes my 2nd week of boring weekend. NO movie in 2 weeks. Gosh!! Missed a lot of new movies. I want to watch Sex and The City 2 !!!!!!!. But its ok, even if boyfie and me can't watch movie, I don't mind as long as he's still around. I accompanied him for the past 1 week in Sportiva. Tired but worth while. Boyfie is down with fever and cold. Kesian him and he's so stubborn towards medicine. You'll feel like killing yourself just to pujuk him to take medicine. He's been falling a sick a few times this year itself. I know you're tired. Daytime in office and evening till late at night in futsal centre. Hopefully the it is worth your effort that you put.

Going to meet up with Fifi and Khang later after work. I'm so excited!!! Woohoo....I missed you two BFF....Best part about meeting them is the gossip segment. Ahahaha. Please, don't tell me you say NO to gossips...Khang is like the CNN...Ahahahahaha.

Anyway I feel like my head is going to explode. Everything is jumbling up and I'm in the middle of the crossroad. Class starting soon..Goshh...

durian oh durian

Pictures say a thousand words.

last day at home

Well, it is 10.15am. I just woke. Couldn't sleep after 6am. I'm not looking forward to go back Penang. How I wish Perlis is a big city so that I don't have to move else where. Close to teh family as well. BFF is coming later to pick me up and we plan to visit an old friend of us back in high school. It has been years since we last met. She's married with 4 kids. So cute. Anyway Along will be tagging along. Then after that, we'll be heading back to Penang which is the hardest and saddest part of the trip.

Messaging with boyfie yesterday and I know he's going through a rough time. God, please give him the strength to go through all this. Show him the right path. Give him calmness and every strength in every part of the world so that he can pull through. And I miss him as well.

Mummy's baking bread. Nothing beats a home cook bakery and dish.

days when you and your dad had the quiet moment

Today was suppose to be a happy dinner as I planned to treat my family for dinner and I did. But before that, I had a bad argument with daddy. Felt bad though. The argument was about my young and rebellious sister. Do you ever have a stubborn, rebellious and arrogant sister that sometimes you want to choke her???? I do. Even then I still love her as we have the same DNA strains in both our body where no matter what we do, we're still sisters. But you know a teenager who's age between 15 to 17 ( I had my rebellious years myself). Things have change for the past couple of years where teenagers in those days are not like today. Weird isn't it.

Last time, when we have to call our parents, we use the public phone, but now kids are using Sony Ericsson that cost thousands.

Last time, when we want to buy sneakers, we go to Bata. But now, they buy Converse (which is for them the cheapest brand they can get).

Last time, we only bring $1.00, maximum $2.00. But now they're bringing $50.

Last time, the meaning of lepak is at kopitiam, but now kids choose Starbucks...Damn.

See what I mean. I don't how am I going to support her in the future. Things have change so much that sometimes we missed certain things.

durian season is soooo good

So I came back with BFF. Started our journey at 9pm. And we stopped by SP, to drop Intan (BFF's cousin). Thinking that her friends will be back as well. But in the end, she decided to follow us. It was so quiet and I wouldn't dare to stay alone as well. Anyway, since I have to take my dinner. BFF suggested us to stop by Alor Star stadium. Coincidently I was craving their famous naan bread as well but as we reached there, the place was crowded as there was a live football match against Brazil and Portugal, so we turned back and headed straight to Perlis and stopped by Seriab to have dinner. We ordered daging merah, ayam merah and tomyam. Sat for a while and went off. So by the time I reach home, it was like 1 am. the journey that was suppose to be only 2 hours have become 4 hours. Hahahaha..

Anyway, I was craving to have durian since it is durian season. Penang is so expensive and does not taste as nice as Perlis. Hahaha. I asked my god brother to get a few for me. Have not eaten yet actually. Before that mummy and me drove to Batu Pahat thinking there might be people selling durians along the roadside but there was nothing and no one so we drove home empty handed. Trying to find mango for boyfie as well as he like to eat mango but none left as mango season has passed. But I'll try to find again tomorrow. I miss him a lot :-( .

And I know someone will be 'happy'...

am i getting skinner?

True, my weight has gone down drastically. Oo btw, I'm going back to Perlis this weekend. Woohoo. I'm soooo excited. I didn't get the chance to celebrate Father's Day with the family so I'll pay for it this time. Sorry Dadddy..Anyway, work is terribly bad and tiring. I don't get enough rest and eat. Been working like hell for the past couple of weeks. Hope things would be better by this month end. Class starting soon and I have yet to go for my medical check up. Macam nak start keja baru la pulak. Not sure whether I can balance between my classes and my work but I do hope that my masters will bring me some benefit after this. I'm grateful that I manage to pursue my masters as it was mumm'y dream to see me finishing my masters, and it is also part of my wishlist to go for masters. So basically it is a win-win situation.

Scenario number 2.
What do you think if you ex mentioned YOUR NAME in facebook. The best part is your break-up history is really bad. Annoyed?Disgusted?Pissed? I feel everything. One thing for sure I would want 4 tough guy to pin him down the floor and I will do the punching. That would definitely reliefs me. I hold grudge on him, to be honest. When we broke up, I swear that I don't want to have anything to do with him anymore and deleted him from my thumbdrive, my hard drive and deleted everything that has to do with him including his smell. Sounds freaky right. But try to be in my shoe. You'll know how it feels like. I was weak at that time and I'm sooooooooooooooo f***ing over him. For all the girls out there (or his current gf), you chose the wrong guy. But its not your fault as I don't think he tells you what he was like back then. I can say that he lie a lot of thing to you, ain't?? Make an effort to dig it out like how I did last time.

3rd scenario
Well, I feel drain off and not sure why maybe I worked to hard and loose my balance in life. You know there's one point where you feel like leaving everything behind and get yourself a nice holiday. that's how I feel now. Drained and tired. I kept reminding myself that I'm sttrong inside and this is life. I never thought I will grow up this fast. Feels like I'm still in high school/college. But now it has been 2 years since I graduated from my degree. How time flew so fast. Till today, I don't think I'm ready to face the working world but I know I have to in the end. It is just a matter of time. Daddy and mummy has been so supportive to me and I'm doing this for them as well and I know I have a big responsibilities toward Adik. She's counting on me in the future. I have a lot of big dreams but I'm not sure whether I can achieve all that or not. Sometimes I feel like the dreams I have are moving further and further away.

today was tiring

Saturday was ok but Sunday was gooooood (as I don't have to work on that day:-) ). Went to QB. Was plannig to watch Sex and the City 2. have already booked the ticket but we went late and ticket has been canceled. So we decided to take a stroll in the shopping mall. We went to Palace of India for dinner (2 days in a row). Teringin want to makan punya pasal. Ordered my favorite dish (masala something, can't remember). And then went for ice-cream at Baskin Robbin. Both of us ate quite a lot during the weekends.

Called daddy yesterday to wish him Father's Day. Sad that I couldn't celebrate with them as I had to work. Anyway, BFF asked whether I would want to follow her back to Perlis. I said yes. Hahahaha...BFF, we're gonna go for a road trip....Woohoo.. Plan to buy some durians back. her car is gonna sting man...Too bad..Hahaha.

daddy, daddy cool...

I'm stuck in Penang tomorrow and it is Father's Day. Crap...Plan to buy someting nice for daddy but out of budget. Currently talking to a customer on the line while blogging. Cool ei...Haha.

Dear daddy,
Thank you for all the support you have provided to the family. All the hard work, tears, sweat due to all the hard work. We love you a lot. You're the person who guided us on our first bicycle ride, first day at school (mummy as well), first day in high school, first day in uni and graduation day. We proud to say that we're grateful to have a father like you.

Happy Father's Day Daddy

We Love YOu Daddy.

spanish class?? You've gotta be joking

Despite having bad migraine, I have to drive to the clinic and stop by USM in regards of my USM application that has been approved. At the same time, met up with an old friend where we met in secondary school, Along. She guided me through roughly the process of my online registration for my subjects. My first master's class will be around the corner and I'm freaking excited and nervous at the same. I got the timetable and the fees are quite 'reasonable'.And I have a Japanese lecturer who is going to teach us economic class. Cool ei.... Before that we stopped by Graduate School of Business (GSB) to enquire some info on how to go about the online application. Sounded easy even though the offer letter that I got looked complicated. Anyway, the 'abang' was friendly enough to share some info with us. Surprisingly enough as most government officers are quite 'friendly' at times. So now I'm in USM lab blogging and at the same time finishing my registration but sadly, the website is under maintenance.

To be honest, I have never though that I would be able to pursue my masters as I was a lzay bump back in high school. I love to sleep and that is untill today. Boyfie said I'm a piglet. Hahaha. I'm very grateful that after all the things I've been through, GOD gave a second chance to prove myself. I thank HIM for all the guidance, the support and the strength HE gave me untill today. And I know the fact that I'm no saint as a human. I do bad things but still HE protected me. Also not to forget biggest second thank to daddy and mummy, for EVERYTHING they have sacrifise for me, the money, time and everything they could possibly provide me. And another important person is boyfie, thank you so much for your tolerence and patience you had since we met. The staying till wee hours accompanying me during my exam periods. You and the family has given me so much that it is not enough by just saying thank you. If not because all of you, I would never be standing here now. Also BFF, for being there always, listening to my nonsense and nagging. I promise that I'll do my best, better than my degree and will definitely make all of you proud of me.

This is like a dream. A dream that I could not possibly think of. Another thing to bring back on track is my online business. Once everything settle, here I come again. This time, ALL OUT...

And GOD, please help me this time around again. Give me the strength, patience and guidance to pursue my studies. Show me the road to success and give me the ease to learn things during this period. And show me what is right and what is wrong. Guide me to the correct path and bless me with all the goodness in life. Bless my family and my loved ones.

hati sakit

Well, sometimes, we just have to swallow deep the pain that we feel in order to keep 'everyone's' feeling happy and satisfied. In the end, we are the one who suffers inside. With my workload bundling up, with my classes around the corner, it seems to be upside down. Not sure whether I can coupe with all this nonsense. With some 'things' that are out of my control, it makes me wonder, is it worth it???

feels like slapping the living s***

As per the title above, that's how stressful I am. Feels like chocking someone.. Everything is so messy.God...I'm starting my masters next month and I'm not sure whether I can divide my time between work and uni...This is so tense. Anyway, working on Sunday morning when everyone is still sleeping...Boyfie spent most of his time 'dating' with his PS2. We didn't catch any movie yesterday. Lucky or else I'll be dead. Woke up late this morning but reached work on time... Pheww...

movie date with boyfie and an evening with the girls

Went out with BFF and her cousin, Intan. Attended a beauty class in Pulau Tikus (Belissa Row). It was fun. And met Thipah as she invited us to join. It's a 2 hours class and filled with fun. We got the opportunity to try out the products ( Mary Kay). It was good. the after effect is immediately. I was immediately hooked to the products and went back home to 'negotiate with boyfie...hahahha.. After the class, we went to QB, BFF and her cousin wanted to buy a set of CROC shoes (they have big jumble sales beside BORDERS). I fell in love with this one

It's only RM60. So I tried it on, sadly it doesn't fit me even though it is size W4. Too many people has tried on the shoe, so possible reason is it expanded. So I ended empty handed. Only BFF managed to bought this one. I liked this but coulnd't find my size. *sobbing*.

And we went back about 9pm, so I hung out at BFF's place while waiting for boyfie to watch midnite movie. We watched Karate Kid. It was not bad. Full of cuteness and actions. Imgaine Will Smith's skinny tight son has a six pack...GOD....

wedding dinner

Picture was taken last Saturday in conjunction of Kamini's wedding dinner. Went with boyfie and Dinesh. Bumped into a few college classmates. All of them are working now. And till now I can't believe that Kamini is married. It was held in Chee Hoon Khor Moral Uplifting Centre. It feels like just yesterday I went to her house for our weekly study group. How time flies. I miss those days. Years without pressure, just plain fun. Exclude the exam part. No one likes that ok.

Anyway, work is getting hectic and I hate that. I'm exhausted. F**** exhausted. With my master's class starting next month. I hope I can coupe with my classes despite of my work schedule.

last night at home

Came back from town after picking up mummy from the bus station. Before that, daddy and me went for dinner at a nasi kandar stall that I used to eat when I was small.. They still taste the same and was looking around the area thinking how time flew so fast....I wish I could come back and work here..Closer to the family..I miss them so badly....

After picking up mummy, went to KFC as mummy hadn't had her lunch and dinner yet. Since adik finish her tuition at 10, so we sat there until she finishes her tuition...

blogger is back home

I'm back in Perlis. Reached yesterday. Finished work at 3pm and rushed back to pack my things. Lucky to get a ticket at a very last minute. Boyfie said if no ticket, he'll send me to Alor Star bus station. Aaww, so sweet of him. Anyway, I woke up at 11am and till now, I'm a stinky as hasn't take my bath yet. Ahahahaha... I felt sooooo excited to be back home....The smell of a small town gives me the heart-beep. Daddy is in the room resting, adik is at her friend house for a group study and mummy is on her way back to Perlis from KL...A long 3 weeks holiday for her:-)..

Daddy suggested me to find a house in Penang as he assumed I might settle down in Penang. Oohh ya, my master's application has approved and I'm starting my class this coming July in USM. I'm so excited. I did not expect I'll get through as I think I busted during the interview session. Big-time some more.Anyway, now that I'm in, I have to focus on getting my masters done, get a better and stable job. Some savings and plan for my wedding...

BFF is in KL, I believe. And she'll be heading to Trengganu tomorrow for training which will take about a week...I hope she'll manage to pull through the nights in Trengganu..Ahahaha...Good luck BFF....

will it do any harm if a girl keep texting your man?

Well said in the title. Not that I say your man is cheating on you. But what will you think if your man's colleague keeps texting or calling your guy even after office hour, weekend and other day even after they meet each other every single fucking weekdays? Horror isn't it...Worst part is if you feel like there's nothing you can do, right??? Horrible feeling I can tell you...

Imagine this...Your man's colleague msged your boyfie everytime for no reason. Yes, you can msg a guy to ask how are you................If you both don't meet each other for a very long time.. But in this case, both of them meet each other every fucking weekdays....What the fuck...Yes, your man does all this in front of you. His intention is just messaging a friend and not more than that but the girl don't understand that what she does is wrong. Or maybe pretend to not understand. There's limitation of having a work relationship with a man, especially if he's taken. I'm not accusing anyone over here but if anyone feels threaten or something, then you know the drill.

I'm not a control freak but if this kind of thing happen, don't you feel weird??? I'm not against friendship between a guy and a girl as I have guy friends more than girls but if it's over the board, what will you do???...

So girl, you know what to do....

today was a fairytale

Well, good things will come eventually if you have the patience. Enough said, boyfie came back after all my hard prayers, my tears and what-so-ever-nonsense nightmares i had for the past few days. We celebrated by having a simple dinner at Friday's and movie later on, The Bounty Hunter. Honestly, I give 4 stars. The only reason I still honoring the stars is because there are some romantic parts in the movie. Movie lasted about 2 hours I think. Due to lack of rest for the past few days, my eyes was watery and I was exhausted. But happy at the same time as boyfie has come back.

Anyway, I'm having Q2 kick-off dinner later tonight ar Bagan bar and restaurant. Looking forward for free food.Hahaha...Who does not...Sadly, I can't bring boyfie along. If possible, I would want to drag him everywhere. Pity him...

Anyway, I'm recovered from my fever, but not 100% yet. Still having bad cough and flu. I hate the weather.

Most important of all, I've learnt my lesson for the past few days. Trust your man especially if he does not have any history of cheating. And never ever take him for granted. A relationship is based on give-and-take policy. But for all the girls out there, don't take people's boyfriend for granted as well... Sometimes being too close to other people's boyfriend can lead to misunderstanding eventhough they're just friends. Well you know, GOD gave us brain to think,so use it and play safe. Why want to get yourself into trouble or being the caused of separation in other people's relationship???

HAVE A GREAT WEEKEND, PEOPLE!!!

lonely,pathetic and sick.

I guess blogspot will be my 'best friend' for the next God-knows how many more days.

I didn't sleep at all yesterday night. Been turning around the bed, in and out the toilet, heart pumping so fast, sweating and when I tried to sleep, half way through, I had nightmare..I had to wake up and washed my face. The nightmare seems so real and I can't differentiate which is reality and which is dream. I was so scared. I turned on the light and eventually its already 4.30am. So I though, since I can't sleep, might as well I take a shower and head to the office earlier to clear my email. God, hundreds of emails to clear and I managed to clear them. Pphheeww..I looked at the mirror this morning and GOD, I looked like a walking corpse.

I lost appetite in eating, keeping myself in the room, staring at the 4 white walls and now I start drawing...Imagine how pathetic it is. I miss boyfie extremely a lot. The house has been very quiet. I miss his jokes, his smile, his laughter, everything about him. I've never felt this much lost before. I know I made a mistake previously but I'm willing to do anything to make him come back.He's my strength and my support. He took good care of me and accept me the way I am. No one can ever replace him.

When you have that perfect someone, you would want to keep forever.This is what I feel at the moment.